Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Books, books, books!
Hadley's newest, most favorite thing to do is read books. She just LOVES them. She will bring them to Mike and I to read to her or she'll sit and turn the pages all by herself for sometimes a half hour straight. Of course Mike and I are pleased as punch that she enjoys reading as that is something that we both love and wish to pass on to her.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Pink Camo
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Grams
Those of you who know me well, know my grams. It would be impossible to have spent any sort of significant time with me and not have heard of her, you see, she and I have always been close. My grams, whose real name is Margaret, is known to most by grams or grandma. Hadley's middle name is in her honor. Grams will be 91 years old in April, her long life has shown her more than most. She lost both her parents at a young age, raised all of her siblings in times before children were put into foster homes when parents were lost, was married to my grandfather for 50 years and was only separated from him by his death, lost a son, lived through the Depression and saw amazing advancements in technology. Grams likes to say, "the only thing I know about computers is how to spell the word". She is an amazing woman.
Today Grams lost her independence. She was transported to the hospital at 2:00 in the morning by ambulance after calling my mother to say that she couldn't get out of bed. After x-raying her body the doctors told my mom and step dad that her bones are crumbling. She has long suffered from Osteoporosis. The doctors told my mom that she cannot return home, she must go live in a nursing home. Grams knew it, she told my sister today, amidst her morphine induced confusion, "I had a choice to make, I could either bite my lip and not tell anyone how much pain I was in or ask for the help I need." What a choice to make... A choice that she knew would take her away from her home, her own bed, her independence. She knows she made the right choice, but it kills us all. The thought of her in that hospital room all alone hurts my heart. I know she has the best of care, but I cannot help but wonder if she is scared and lonely.
Grams used to care for my sister and I when we were home sick from school. I remember doing dishes with her in her kitchen once when I was a kid and we had a water fight with the sprayer from the sink. Only a really cool grandma does stuff like that. We used to go to her house after school before our mom got home. She would carve apples for us with peanut butter and always have the best snacks waiting on the table for the minute we walked through the door.
It is hard to watch someone who used to drive you to doctor appointments, take you shopping and go on vacation with you become old. Grams hasn't left her house, outside of getting her hair done once a week, in years. Her life has become simplistic and is mostly about watching TV. She is a big fan of American Idol, Deal or No Deal, is up on the latest of politics and thinks she has President Bush all figured out and it's not good. :) (just ask her, she'll tell you!)
We've all tried to visit when we can and help out when we can, but my mom has clearly taken the biggest hit in caring for Grams. She has essentially become her caretaker in the last many years. She has often said to Lindsay and I, "when I get to this point, just put me in a home, don't ever do this for me". It has worn on her, but everyday she wakes up and does it again. She makes all her meals, bathes her, cleans for her, does her shopping, does her laundry, brings in her mail, etc. She too is an amazing woman and I admire her unfailing devotion to her mother.
I suppose this is the last chapter in Grams' life. I was saying to a friend today that when someone gets to this age you begin to expect something like this or death to occur, but it never makes it easier when it finally happens. I never wanted to see the day that Grams had to go to a nursing home. I always hoped she would peacefully fall asleep one night in her own bed, in her own home, and join Grandpa as I think she has secretly hoped for for a long time now. But, perhaps this will be really good for her. Perhaps she'll enjoy being somewhere were she has constant attention and people to interact with. I hope so.
All I know is that I will be making a weekly visit to her. I will sit by her bedside and listen to the stories, the ones she has told me a million times, but never get old. The ones that make me marvel at all she has seen and done in her 91 years. I will try with all my might to remember each and every one to tell Hadley someday. I will tell her the story of her namesake and what an amazing woman she was. I will tell her how much she loved all of us and especially her. I will tell her that this amazing woman made her mommy always feel like the most special of all girls. I only hope in my heart that grams knows this...
Friday, January 25, 2008
Championship game
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Not a baby anymore
With Hadley's first birthday approaching at warp speed it seems, we have been talking so much of what a big girl she has become. Here are a couple pics from this morning. I just had to take a couple because I looked at her in her cute little sweater and I swear I could see her standing in front of me at 16 and it felt for a moment like that will be tomorrow. She'll always be my baby though....
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Talking to daddy
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Walking
Here's a little video of Hadley walking. I cannot figure out how to make it right side up so I apologize, but enjoy! It is crazy how much she is walking now, it is so weird to see. It is so cute, because you can see on her face how proud she is of herself!
Finally they meet
Hadley finally got to meet Orion today. She was sick around the time that he was born and then due to plans, etc. they weren't able to meet until today. She was so excited, it was quite cute. She kept saying baby over and over again and wanted so badly to touch him. She doesn't really understand the concept of gentle yet, but we helped her out. Orion was probably wondering who this loud little girl was in his house, but soon enough they'll be running around together!!!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
11 months old
Yesterday was Hadley's 11 month old birthday! I didn't have time to post yesterday, but a day late is better than never. Wow, one month away is her one year birthday, a whole year! Time flies. She is so fun right now (we know, we say that all the time!) She is walking a little more each and every day and is gaining confidence that way. She is learning more and more words too, the most recent additions are Hi and Boo! She understands what it means to tickle and loves to come up to Mike and I and tickle us, it is the cutest thing. She also got the green light to start drinking whole milk. She only drinks one bottle now, at night. The other exciting development there is that we were SUPER nervous about trying to break her of using her nighttime bottle to fall asleep. The doctor told us that at a year she should really be done with bottles because it isn't good for her or necessary anymore. So, we geared ourselves up Friday night and decided to change her routine to having her nighttime bottle before her bath, then bath and bed. We were so nervous because she has had the same routine for almost her whole life and it included falling asleep with her bottle. So, there we were, so excited, she did awesome! Bottle, bath, pj's, one round of you are my sunshine and she was on her way to la la land, all on her own. Tonight we are on night 6 and she has done great every night, we are so happy and lucky! She is getting to be such a little girl, not a baby anymore.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
The obsession continues...
In case anyone was worried, don't be, Hadley is still madly in love with Elmo! Her friend, Tyler, let her borrow his Elmo chair because he doesn't really use it and Hadley is thrilled! As you can see, her favorite thing to do is sit in the Elmo chair, holding the infamous Elmo doll, while watching Elmo!!!! It's like Elmo threw up in our house!!!
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Who knew?
Friday, January 11, 2008
Monday, January 07, 2008
Another baby has arrived!
Evelyn Jay Ellmaker came into the world Monday morning around 4am! Jyl and Jeff are so excited that she is finally here and all are doing well. Little Evie (as her parents will call her) has a middle name of Jay, this was the maiden name of Jyl's grandmother and is in her honor. I went to see the little one today and here are a couple pics!
Congrats Jyl and Jeff!
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Buddies
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Friday, January 04, 2008
What I see...
I meant to post this around Christmas, but with the craziness of the holidays am just getting to it now....
Some see a tattoo covered hispanic male that is not working during the day and is wearing baggy jeans. Many would make the assumption that he is a drug dealer, gang banger, or up to no good. Most would be nervous passing him on the street at night alone.
What I see is a man who got his girlfriend pregnant when they were in high school, begged the judge to let him marry her because that is their culture, served three years in prison for sexual assault of her, married her the week he got out, and has stood by her every day for the past 16 years. I see a man who works two jobs to make ends meet for his family, but still has family game nights whenever he can. I see a man who is standing in the middle of the street taking presents from me that were donated by a family in my church and he doesn't know what to say to me. He is looking at the ground trying to hide his tears and I know how much he appreciates this. He simply shakes his head and says "thank you". I say, as I try to mask my own tears, "have a very merry Christmas" and I turn to leave him with a warm heart, knowing what his Christmas will now be like.
Some see an African American woman who doesn't work and assume that she is just lazy and taking whatever she can from the state. They see a woman with four kids and assume they all have different dads and that she doesn't take care of them.
I see a woman who left the man who is all four kids father because he beat her so bad she couldn't take it anymore. I see a woman who wants to work, but any job that she can get doesn't even cover her daycare costs. I see a woman who is hurting so badly that she doesn't want to get out of bed in the morning, but does it because she is taking care of her kids all on her own and doing the best that she can. I see a woman who doesn't even try to mask her tears as she hugs me and says God bless you and thank you a million times. She tells me that because of these gifts her kids will have something to open on Christmas and that is the most amazing gift ever.
This experience taught me so much. First and foremost it reminded me what Christmas is really about. It isn't about the gifts we get, it is about what we give to others. It reminds me how easy it is to assume what or who a person is, but unless we really know that persons story, we have no idea who they are. I am thankful that I have a job that reminds me of that on a daily basis.
Some see a tattoo covered hispanic male that is not working during the day and is wearing baggy jeans. Many would make the assumption that he is a drug dealer, gang banger, or up to no good. Most would be nervous passing him on the street at night alone.
What I see is a man who got his girlfriend pregnant when they were in high school, begged the judge to let him marry her because that is their culture, served three years in prison for sexual assault of her, married her the week he got out, and has stood by her every day for the past 16 years. I see a man who works two jobs to make ends meet for his family, but still has family game nights whenever he can. I see a man who is standing in the middle of the street taking presents from me that were donated by a family in my church and he doesn't know what to say to me. He is looking at the ground trying to hide his tears and I know how much he appreciates this. He simply shakes his head and says "thank you". I say, as I try to mask my own tears, "have a very merry Christmas" and I turn to leave him with a warm heart, knowing what his Christmas will now be like.
Some see an African American woman who doesn't work and assume that she is just lazy and taking whatever she can from the state. They see a woman with four kids and assume they all have different dads and that she doesn't take care of them.
I see a woman who left the man who is all four kids father because he beat her so bad she couldn't take it anymore. I see a woman who wants to work, but any job that she can get doesn't even cover her daycare costs. I see a woman who is hurting so badly that she doesn't want to get out of bed in the morning, but does it because she is taking care of her kids all on her own and doing the best that she can. I see a woman who doesn't even try to mask her tears as she hugs me and says God bless you and thank you a million times. She tells me that because of these gifts her kids will have something to open on Christmas and that is the most amazing gift ever.
This experience taught me so much. First and foremost it reminded me what Christmas is really about. It isn't about the gifts we get, it is about what we give to others. It reminds me how easy it is to assume what or who a person is, but unless we really know that persons story, we have no idea who they are. I am thankful that I have a job that reminds me of that on a daily basis.
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